Need help setting up Family Sharing on my devices

General
1

I’m trying to set up Family Sharing so my family can share apps, subscriptions, and iCloud storage, but I keep getting confused by the settings and prompts on different devices. I’m not sure who should be the organizer, how to add kids with restrictions, or why some purchases don’t show up. Can someone walk me through the correct steps and common pitfalls for setting up Family Sharing the right way?

2

Here is the clean step by step way to set up Family Sharing without the prompts driving you nuts. I’ll assume you want shared apps, subscriptions, and iCloud storage.

  1. Decide who should be Organizer

    • Use whoever already pays for most Apple stuff.
    • That Apple ID will be the “Organizer” and holds the payment method.
    • That person needs two factor on and a valid payment card on file.

  2. On the Organizer iPhone or iPad

    • Open Settings.
    • Tap your name at the top.
    • Tap Family.
    • Tap Set Up Family.
    • Tap Create Family.
    • Add family members by their Apple ID email.
    • For kids, tap Add Child and follow the prompts to create an Apple ID for them.

  3. Turn on what you want to share
    Still under Family:

    • Tap Subscriptions. Turn on Share with Family for Apple Music, TV+, Arcade, etc.
    • Go back, tap Purchase Sharing. Turn on Purchase Sharing. Confirm the Organizer’s card.
    • Go back, tap iCloud+. Choose a shared iCloud storage plan, 200 GB or 2 TB. Turn on Share iCloud+.

  4. On each adult family member’s device

    • Settings.
    • Tap their name.
    • If they see “Invitations”, tap it and accept the Family invite.
    • Agree to share purchases.
    • Make sure they are using the same Apple ID in Settings and in App Store.
      App Store app > profile picture > check email at the top.

  5. Child accounts and Ask to Buy
    On Organizer device:

    • Settings > your name > Family.
    • Tap the child’s name.
    • Turn on Ask to Buy if you want purchase approval prompts.
    • Tap Share in Family to allow access to shared purchases and subscriptions.

  6. Share iCloud storage

    • Organizer: Settings > your name > Family > iCloud+.
    • Make sure your storage plan is shared.
    • Each member: Settings > their name > iCloud > iCloud Storage.
    • It should say “Using Family Storage”. If it still shows their old plan, tap Manage Storage then Change Storage Plan then choose “Use Family Storage”.

  7. Find shared apps and media
    On a family member’s device:

    • App Store > profile picture > Purchased > Family Purchases.
    • Pick the Organizer’s name. Install apps from there.
    • For Apple Music Family, they open Music and sign in with their own Apple ID, not yours.
    • For Apple TV+, same thing through the TV app.

  8. Common gotchas

    • Everyone needs the same country/region in their Apple ID. Mixed regions break sharing.
    • If someone used a second Apple ID for iTunes in the past, you might see confusion.
      Fix by going to Settings > their name > Media & Purchases and sign in with the same Apple ID they use in Settings.
    • Limit is 6 people in one family group total.

  9. If you need to switch Organizer
    Apple does not have a simple “change organizer” button.
    You have to:

    • Disband current family. Organizer: Settings > your name > Family > Stop Using Family.
    • Wait for everyone to leave the group.
    • New person creates a new family group from their device, then re-invites everyone.
    • Re enable Purchase Sharing, iCloud+, subscriptions.
      Slight pain, but it works.

Once everything is set on the Organizer device, stop tapping “Set Up Family” on other phones.
On other devices, you only accept the invite and confirm sharing. That alone avoids half of the confusing prompts.

3

Couple of things I’d do differently from what @voyageurdubois laid out, mostly to keep your sanity when you’ve got multiple devices screaming “Set up Family!” at you.

1. Who should be Organizer really?
It’s usually the person who pays, but I’d actually pick the person who:

  • Never changes regions or moves countries for work/school
  • Is least likely to forget passwords
  • Is comfortable being spammed with “Ask to Buy” prompts if you add kids

You can always move the payment card to someone else’s Apple ID later, but changing organizer means tearing down the whole family group and rebuilding, which is annoying.

2. Ignore 90% of the prompts
The biggest confusion: every device tries to “help” you by offering to set up Family Sharing. Don’t. On non‑organizer phones:

  • If you see “Set Up Family” just back out of it
  • Only ever accept invites under Settings > [your name] > Family
    Let the organizer do the creating, everyone else only accepts.

3. Check ONE critical screen on each device
After the organizer has set things up like @voyageurdubois described, here’s the sanity checklist for each family member:

  • Settings > [your name]
    • Make sure their Apple ID email here matches
  • Settings > [your name] > Media & Purchases
    • Tap that, make sure it’s the same Apple ID as above
    • If not, sign out, sign in with the same one
  • Settings > [your name] > Family
    • Confirm they actually show in the family group and that Purchase Sharing is on for them

If those 3 match, 90% of weird “I can’t see shared apps” issues vanish.

4. Make sure iCloud storage doesn’t double bill
Disagreeing slightly with the “just switch to family storage” idea: I’d start by canceling personal storage plans for everyone first, then turning on shared iCloud+. Otherwise people end up paying for private plans they forgot about.

Order I use:

  1. Organizer upgrades to 200 GB or 2 TB
  2. Turn on “Share iCloud+”
  3. Each other member:
    • Settings > [name] > iCloud > iCloud Storage
    • If it doesn’t say “Using Family Storage,” tap Manage Storage and choose “Use Family Storage”
  4. Once it shows “Using Family Storage,” then cancel any old personal plans

5. Kids & “Ask to Buy” without losing your mind
Pro tip: only turn on Ask to Buy after you’re sure:

  • Their account is in the right country
  • Purchase Sharing is working
  • They can see shared apps in App Store > profile > Purchased > Family Purchases

If you flip Ask to Buy on too early, you just get spammed with requests that fail.

6. Decide your rule for subscriptions before turning them on
Instead of toggling everything and seeing what happens, pick a simple rule:

  • If it’s Apple Music, TV+, Arcade, News+: make those shared from the organizer
  • If it’s some random app subscription:
    • Only one person pays for it
    • Everyone else logs into that app using their own Apple ID unless it explicitly supports Family Sharing for in‑app purchases

Confusing bit: “Family Sharing supported” on the App Store listing is different from “works with Apple Family Sharing group for in‑app purchases.” Some devs only share the one‑time app purchase, not subscriptions.

7. Quick “did I break it?” checklist for you
On the organizer device:

  • Settings > [your name] > Family
    • Everyone listed?
    • Purchase Sharing: On
    • iCloud+: Shared
    • Subscriptions: anything you want shared toggled On

On another adult’s device:

  • Settings > [their name]
    • Shows the family group
  • App Store > profile
    • “Purchased” > Family Purchases > see organizer’s purchases
  • Settings > [their name] > iCloud > iCloud Storage
    • “Using Family Storage”

If those all look right, you’re set, even if Apple’s random prompts make it feel like you missed 20 hidden steps.

Biggest mental trick: treat one device as “mission control” (the organizer’s iPhone or iPad) and treat every other device as “dumb terminals” that only accept what’s set up there. That alone cuts most of the confusion.